The son of an abusive father and an obsessive mother, Milkman lacks the capacity to empathize with others or to define his own identity. Milkman maintains ôyou canÆt do the past overö (Morrison 78). Despite this initial belief, it is only when Milkman goes South and revisits his past that he discovers the understanding and forgiveness that are necessary to set him free. By coming to terms with his troubled past, Milkman learns to become his own person, forgiving his parents and learning to love himself and others.
Milkman is the product of two conflicting parents, Macon and Ruth. Oppressed by her husband, Ruth sees Milkman as a means of having power over her abusive spouse. We are told Ruth purposefully became pregnant with Milkman ôto hold them together,ö and his birth is viewed by his mother as her one ôaggressive act brought to royal completion,ö (Morrison 131; 133). MaconÆs father is so abusive that Milkman threatens to kill him when he beats Ruth. However, Milkman knows because of their long, tortured relationship, his threats will change nothing, ôIt would change nothing between his parentsàThe game would go onö (Morrison 68).
Because of his abusive past and his parentsÆ tug-of-war for control of him, Milkman thinks he deserves to be loved only ôfrom a distanceö but ôgiven what he wantedö (Morrison 277). This often makes him lack empathy toward others, like Hagar. Macon tries to get Milkman to follow in his footsteps. Ruth wants him to go to school and become a doctor, but his father wants him to go into business. He encourages Milkman to steal PilateÆs gold and when Milkman hits Macon to keep his mother from being beaten, Macon actually admires his some on some level, with ôa grudging feeling of pride in his sonö (Morrison 68). It is this environment and past that keeps Milkman from being able to define himself and to understand his way or path in the world.
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